7/26/17

A High Lover

Feeling high like in a valley
Palm trees so pretty
I can take a picture daily

Sometimes life is boring
Eating chicken has no meaning
In every kind of seasoning

Do you ever wonder
If we can start our night sooner
Before it is too late to be a lover

Sometimes fate is sucks
But we should not deny orders
It is a happiness
Either bad or good things

Life have no meaning
When your soul do not click
In this kind of complicated galaxy

When you and me are
A fantasy

6/10/17

Love is A Boring Thing

Can you tell me how many minutes in an hour?

Sixty minutes

It's not a short time for love

Sixty minutes

Is the longest time I got
To be in love

Can clock ticks backward?
Because I want to undo
Every words I ever said
Every sentences I ever mentioned
That to be in love is pretty
Because it is not

Love is boring

To be in love is another thing

At least for me

Can you build a travel machine?
Because I need to re-think
What I did
What I chose
That a man can not satisfied me in many ways

Love is boring

To be in love is another thing

At least for me

Can we make the smartest man in the world?
Because I've bored by existence
Bored by compliments
Bored by sweet things & words
I need brain to be arouse
It might've satisfied me
Cover all wondering things in my self

Because love is really a boring thing

To be in love is another thing

Hence, it is a sad thing.

6/4/17

I Do Know What Love Is

Love is different from relationship
Love is set to be free
To be aimed higher fantacy
Not publicity

Love can not always be related to people
Towards each other
It has to be alone
Flow in any directions
Without intervention or dictation

Love supposed to heal any pains
Relieve any surgery's mark
Between harm and future
Leave no trace except butterflies

Love is not what you define as blind
It has to be right
If you feel so wrong and guilt
Then you're trapped in relationship
But you no found any loves

Love is mean to be helping
Not destroy
Or kill overjoy
Love is build to be a foundation
Not a river's water
Flow with no end, but dead

Love is not to give and take
It supposed to be one or another
You can't receive more
Or you will get ruined by
Either it's fate
Or love doesn't want you back

Love is free
Love has no commitment
Relationship is not always about love
Love is always there
Even you do not even know

When you think love is your partner
You might see their eyes
And tell your self
It is love?
Or it is just a glimpse of feeling
That you need them
And too afraid to be left out
Dump without care

5/23/17

Limited Seat

Bell is ringing so loud
Put away the essential ideas of being alone
Tackle my froze blood
Pour them in to the glass

That was the final call
To everyone who want to ride my ego
There's no more seat up for grabs
One plus two side every line

You can sit
If I allow you to
Or I tell you to
No question or permission

Do not hang up when I drive
I may not allow you to sit below my hips
Like a kid wants her candy back

No chair was easy
All should be reached by stairs
And sweats
You think you're the one?

Oh darling,
Do not be a stupid man
I only have three seats now
Let's shake the coin and make it go

You will be the last name
On that final call
5 seconds before the door closed

You think you're special?

Oh darling,
Do not be a bighead
I may stab you
With the witty words

Bitter than your kidney

Oh darling,
Take off your seatbelt
It's occupied now

Open the doorknob and run
Go to the end of the road
And pick your own shit

Oh darling,
I wish you cherish my sworn
Before you spit your own gut

Good luck darling,
I'll see you when my seats are free
And ready.




4/20/17

A Major Heartbreak

It's a shame
When you believe people
Will make something different
But eventually they didn't

It's a sadness
When you trust your hopes
To people who will pass it
But they didn't

It's a misplaced
When you see people happy
About being taken care of
But they didn't

It's a waste
When people said need a change
Then they still believe on bullshits
So they won't

It's a stupidity
When people wants someone brave
But they eaten up by money & theories

I feel my chest is open at her biggest hole
The ocean water deep in my heart dry
Sinking to my hopes
With the rain

I am in a major heartbreak
Bigger than love can destroy
Smaller than God plans

I was sad
But I know
God might do not want to be rush
Or
Another disaster will come

I still believe in you
To be another good person for another better occasion

4/9/17

April 9th

I ate a dried plum
Under the mask you made
Chew the seed
Taste the bit after

I don't care for what I ate
I keep chewing
Till the last bite

Now my dried plum gone
Starting to eat my finger
Then you come

Give me another dried plum
With bigger seed
So I won't chew it

But I don't care
For what I eat
As long as I carry this plum
Beneath my hand

You see?
He ask
What?
I confuse

You're just hungry
Not out of hope
You're just need someone
To give you something to process
Not blank

You know?
He ask
What?
I consider

You're not alone
You can keep the seed
Don't burry inside your mouth
Because I might gone
Somewhere
To plant another plum

And give you some
Whenever you feel hungry

But promise me
Don't be a fool
When I am not around

You're talking to me?
I confuse

No
He said
I am talking to an empty soul without a smile

4/6/17

April 6th

Make me stay
For a while
Even for a drink
Or just to sip a can of orange juice

Make me awake
Through the thunder storm
And heavy rain
Just to see the water drop by

Make me alive
Pinch me while I asleep
Kiss me while I cry
Just to know I have you
For enough time

Make me smile
Talk to me like you're a high paid comedian
Just to remain me
That I can laugh
Even when I want to throw up

Make me stay
Even for a minute
Just to reassure
That we're no longer imaginary
Between what is will
And reality

3/20/17

Drawing A Sky

Spill the paint by your hand
Spread them out
Till reach the sky

Run if you can
To the end of the world
And see a better rainbow
Hanging there below the tree

Green, blue, red, yellow and blue
It's your nail polish
From the paint box

I know you're happy
You laugh
Then jump

Orange, purple and pink
You mash up your nail polish
Now you see them with 3 colors
In the sky

I know you're happy
You laugh
Then run

Pointing at the box full of paints
You pick white and black
And spill them

Go fly to reach the top of the sky
And it's raining

I know you're worry, but
You laugh
Then cry

Let's go home
And showering
The sky might get more clear
Like the water bubble in your duck's 

You draw sky with your nail
Pretty
As you ever be

1/22/17

A Mind Ghost

It is my fictional man
Who used to brought me flowers
Sang me a lullaby
And ride me home after dinner

He wore white shirt
And blue denim
With that loose socks
And old vans shoes

We used to laugh together
Over silly jokes
And people came by
Through our sight

He never called me by my name
He use his code
I am his blah
And he's my brew

Playing mind trick is fun
You can shape anyone
To be anything you want to

Unless,
You stay walk on the road
Not on the sky

But now he's gone
Eat up by my egoism
Ran away from my silence
Leaving me many questions

I should build
Another fictional character
To find him
And tell
Thank you

For remaining in my mind
For staying in my head
For accepting what I was.

Sunday Blues

We already parted
Before we could say hello
Time is sucks
Running bluntly
Without compromising

Yesterday I saw you
In the best part of your shirt
Leaning your arms
To be my head pillow

Something confuse me
There were two of you
Different faces
Same scent
And favorite songs

I woke up
Feeling blues
Wandering why
I should see you
In the middle of crazy days

We never been allied
But I can use your jokes
Inside a small chat
Between me
And someone I don't even know

I thought mother earth was right
Sending me some signs
After new year
To tell me
No one's easy
No one's care

But last night I saw you
In the middle of sleeping
Walking behind me
Wear your favorite shirt
And singing that song

New year will still the same
You still a lucid thing
That I barely touch
Or see

12/13/16

Who is who?

Everyone seems so easy
Using some words to be their hype
Put the dictionary away
And create what they believe from what they see

Seriously?
Who are you?
Is your brain capability isn't enough
To produce lenghty word longer than tongue

The world doesn't made from imitation gold
It is nature
They were born within
They learn to grow and evaluate
Not imitating

Seriously?
Who is who?
Not the matter of time or euphoria
But people create something
To be seen
Not duplicate

Grow your green grass
Not by cutting them to sabotage mine
Seriously?
Who are you?
Who is who?
It's so hard just to claim what is mine

11/10/16

Menjadi Dewasa Itu

Mungkin begini rasanya menjadi dewasa
Ketika semua pilihan ada diujung jari
Tidak lagi menunggu jawaban persetujuan dari orang tua
Siap menerima apapun risiko nanti

Tak pernah terkira jika sekarang aku bukan lagi bayi
Yang setiap hari merengek meminta ASI
Sudah saatnya sekarang aku yang harus memberi
Meskipun tidak sejagat raya, tapi percayalah ini naluri

Ternyata menjadi orang dewasa itu nikmat
Semua rasa pernah dihadapi
Masalah yang datang tidak harus menjadikan sakit
Tapi membuat kita belajar untuk tetap bangun di pagi hari

Menjadi dewasa itu picik
Bukan ego yang kita junjung
Tapi ada banyak pilihan dan kebutuhan yang pelik
Yang selalu muncul setiap saat tidak ada ujung

Mungkin menjadi dewasa adalah anugerah
Tidak bisa terelakkan
Betapa nikmatnya memutar otak hingga jengah
Betapa asyiknya main muka hingga bosan

Dewasa sungguh bukan pilihan
Namun kewajiban
Tanggung jawab
Bukan hanya ijab

10/30/16

Shaping Love

We never find any right answers to this kind of question
How we can keep being in love?
Without knowing someday we lost them
Turning into ashes
And burn yourself down

Ten years can not keep love survive
Time really looks like shit and hell
The longer you hold
The weaker you will realize
That love is cheaper than your tears

Should we take a precaution before being in love?
Because some people do not want to be ruined
Harmed and hatred by their own body

Peaking to the future is a sin
But maybe we can bring some hoping stuff
To shape the love that we dream of
That we want to aim
That we want to cherish

Will love ever understand?
For not stopping in the false land
Just in case we do not agree

Love should be controlled by our hands
So they won't become oversize
Because we do not have to provide a bigger space for it
Bigger thing takes time

Or can we just make a deal before love landing in the new place?
Delaying the flight just a couple of minutes
To discuss
Whether we should go home
Or fly

Let's dream together
Till we can certain what shape of love that we should accept.

10/1/16

Short Escape

Let's start the engine
The police will show up at nine
We have to leave before sunrise
The sooner the better

Feeling separated so far away
From my own flesh
Looking for a new soul
And happiness

Wake up honey
It's four in the morning
Wash your body
And take the key

To the beach
To the mountain
We drive along
With music on

I don't care if it's raining
As long as I don't see any buildings
And people complaining
As long as I travel with you
And enough money

This could be the continuous driving
We ever made
27 hours non-stop
And looking back to the bed we used to sleep

Next sunset is ready to catch up
It's time to put down the car
And having a nice cup of tea

I'll miss you
With the shortest time I had

9/24/16

Infinite Emptiness

We at least try to be a good person
Affected by the people we knew for a long time
Or people we barely knew
Even a stranger.

If you think you can change the world by being a good person
You might be wrong
They do not need your empathy or tears
Everyone needs non fiction result.

Still thinking about being a good person is hard?
I guess so
Do not assume if you keep quite for what you've seen
You can be called as a kind man
People will yelled at you
Calling you a scumbag.

Guilty will haunt you, endlessly
Like you will sleep like a baby no more
Chewing a bit candy
Instead of a shining wrapper.

You all gonna be doomed by assumptions
End up being a garbage
Throw out to a trash can no one will find.

The heart will ripped out
Trade the soul for the evil
Like what Nicolas ever did.

9/16/16

Defining Times

It's only twenty-four hours in a day
When others can do 5 kinds of task
While you only sit in the chair doing nothing
Merely having an empty stare or fluffy eyes

Sixty minutes can be used to dig a grave and growing a grass
While we only spending it by eating something pricey
But then lasts in photo only

What time is it?
You keep your hands busy to look for your phone to respond
While others would raise their hands to show off the time

How many times do you need?
More than everyone needs
Less than a death comes 
But longer to confess the sin respectfully

I can not tell people about my time
There's a tentative barrier during my setting
But still, time is a very important thing to me

And how I define time?
It's short thing that either you will take it or leave it
Depress you when you don't make it fully

Put a detail attention to the time that won't last
To the time that won't stay
Unless you reserve it like a rose in the garden

What's time for me?
A honey to the Pooh.

8/20/16

The Flaws

Morning won’t come any faster.
Not today, in the mid of summer.
The sun is up, but the wind blows hard.
A drizzle of the rain dropped, make all cars ugly.
With a slight of mud in the back of the trunk.
Nobody sees, they all have the same flaws.

Like exactly what people will look at you.
You let them see the pain, the more they don’t care.
Shittiest thing happened to many people.
Problems hit everyone on the road.
The ugly car won’t ruin your days, but the clean one does.
But the right thing will stay the same, don’t try to trade it.

Brain is a thing you trained by knowledge.
But feeling, something you can’t learn through machine.
It fits you, in any forms of shape.
They don’t see if you’re rich or ugly.
What makes people different?
The only answer you can get is by asking them.
Not only judge by the way they holding a cup of coffee.

Is there anything better than a don’t judge by it’s cover quote?
I don’t think so either. So do you.

Do not worry when someone hit your car in the middle of the rain.
The thing you have to worry about is, when the car hit people who walk in the road when it’s raining.

Be good, maybe they will do the same upon you.

In The Name of Losing

They never touch, or seduce me.
But my mind is high and loud, thought they will be coming after me.
Holding my breaths away and send them to the moon.
Trespassing the stars and meteors.
How I am so jealous of my own breaths.
They are the first thing will always come up with a super dream.
What else can I get?

The lightly sparks in the moon make my nerves calm.
Making my eyes shut, and my mouth dry.
There’s a soul in the moon land, in the name of curiosity and love.
Wondering what a soul can do in the place with no hope and tears.
Where else we can go?

They have not pick the other soul to sell.
For all I know, there’s only one stone in the dune, lonely.
The feeling transfers to my mind.
It sickening, how I will end up without no one fly to pick me up.
What else I can do?

The uncertainty of time is evil.
My soul becomes rough, freezing and weak.
Like your butter soaps in the end of the month.
I though I might die. Without knowing where’s my soul landed.
Who else will go to save mine?

Let the nature sum it up.
And tell me when I lie down in the grave for the name of losing.


8/14/16